Growing up, I went through some hard times… while school was easy for me, getting through the day was hard. I wasn’t cool in Elementary school and this led me to be a target, and honestly… bullied. For years, I learned to keep my mouth shut and just get through the day. Then… I found my voice again. Since that day, I use my voice to stand up for those who are beat down or marginalized. Don’t let yourself be silenced.
My Story:
I can actually remember this story so vividly it brings back the fear and pain. While many times walking home from school in Elementary grades, I would be picked on… called names… this time was different. It was the first time where I felt humiliated and had my soul crushed.
It was in 5th grade… I had left school and was about a block away. I had my walkman on and listening to music and up ahead I saw one of the kids that had constantly been teasing me. Even with my music on, I could hear him yelling “Come on Four Eyes…” I kept walking towards him with confidence on the outside but fear in my stomach. This time felt different.
Sure enough, I was right. As I was approaching him, suddenly, two kids sprung from the hedges… grabbed me, and pulled me behind the hedges. After hitting me a few times, they freed my backpack from me, and proceeded to throw every book, paper, and notebook out… ripping it apart. — One kid even spit on me as I was on the ground. Even after they were done and seemingly left me there… it was really only the beginning of the damage. — I made sure to leave school quicker… I hid from them… I didn’t speak up as much in fear of being “smart”… I just learned to rely on myself.
I’d like to tell you that this event was isolated… that it didn’t continue… but… well… kids are mean. Over the coming years, I learned to only count on myself.
How I practice it today:
When you don’t feel safe; when you don’t feel good about yourself; when you feel alone… it’s a dark place. When I look around, I see people today who are accidentally aggressive with their friends, or colleagues and taking a stand against that type of behavior is something I believe in. Take the time to make sure you include the ones that don’t speak up… take the time to ask people how they are feeling… take the time to make your interactions positive as they can be, even in a sea of turmoil.
Lastly… to my kids… I can’t say that this isn’t going to happen to you. The sad reality is our world is now more than ever mobilizing the armies of hate and fear; of division and power. If this happens to you or your kids, get help. Get your voice back.
A Gift from your Father 